The day I moved Mom into Assisted Living is still with me. It’s a scratch and sniff polaroid of a memory pinned to my forehead. Unlike other memories because of how holistically vivid it is. I remember every look, sound, and smell as if it were all happening in slow motion. Too Vivid Mom’s …
A Letter To My Pre-Caregiving Self
If I were to write a letter to myself before caregiving, here's what I'd write. Dear Matt, You can do this. The caregiving road you’re about to walk will be at once the scariest, saddest, most stressful, and most beautiful journey you’ll ever make. But you can do this. I know it seems …
Mom’s Move To A Senior Living Community Left A Mark
The day Mom moved to her senior living community left a mark. “WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME?!?!” Mom screamed through a waterfall of tears as I pulled into a parking spot at her new home. She was speaking fast but the words seemed to register with me in slow motion, each one feeling like an …
Mom’s Dementia Has Her Thinking She’s Still a Nurse. It’s Killing Me.
Learning to roll with Mom’s reality was one of the earliest and hardest lessons I learned as a dementia caregiver. Our reality, now that she is living with dementia, is that her reality is, at times, different than mine. And I need to roll with it. When we first started down this road I couldn’t …
David The Shoe Salesman, An Act Of Kindness, And Faith Restored.
Dear David - Your act of kindness yesterday left what will be an everlasting imprint in my memory. If not for her Alzheimer’s, you would’ve stamped Mom’s memory too. We were leaving her neurologist’s office when Mom mentioned to me that she’d like some new everyday shoes. All things considered, …
Have Caregiving Stories? Will You Share?
When we were going through the process of finding the right senior living and care for our parents, we were fortunate to meet (offline, in our town as luck would have it) amazing people who’d already walked the road we were beginning to walk. We learned from their experience with specific …
Mom’s Dementia Look
No matter where Mom is, she’ll talk to anyone. She’s always been that way. In the waiting room at the doctor’s office? She’s making conversation. Walking down the street? She’s looking to engage. God help you if you’re seated next to her on a plane and want to keep to yourself. She’ll get …
A Little Robotic Cat And A Big Reminder
I was wrong. About a robotic cat. I declare this happily and with feelings of gratitude. I’d shout it from the rooftops if I could--because of what it means. Here’s the scoop. First, a little context: I’m wrong often. Wrong about big things, small things, meaningless things, and meaningful …
The Day I (Really) Became Mom’s Caregiver
This was the day I officially became Mom's caregiver. The alarm woke me at 5:30. Outside, it was cold, dark and quiet, a typical mid-October morning. As quickly and quietly as I could, I hit the shower, grabbed some breakfast and got on the road. It was a Wednesday morning, but I wasn’t going to …
